Wee Story behind this one: Many years ago the Guards had a Regimental Seargent Major and whenever he was on the Telephone speaking to an Officer before he put the phone down he would Stand Up, Come to Attention, and say, ' I am saluting you now Sir '. He would salute over the Telephone. Pillock!!!
Wee Story behind this one: Many Years ago Kenny had been out on the Beavy ( Drink ) He was so drunk he tripped over the Kirb, fell flat on his face and started to Crawl. Around the area where Kenny lived there were many Iron Railings and upon falling and crossing the pavement Kenny came in contact with the Iron Railings. He started to crawl once more but this time he was going hand over hand along the Railings. Next morning Kenny's story was, that last night he was crawling up a big Ladder and had the Ladder not suddenly dissapeared he was sure he would have reached Heaven. Had there not been witnesses to this I am sure Kenny would have convinced his whole neighborhood, that he had, in fact, been on his way to Heaven.
Wee story behind this one: As a young Piper in the Scots Guards I had one terrible week where I happened to break Three Chanters, not deliberatly I might add, although some seemed to think it was. We were out Training and living in some terrible accomodation and we had rickety type shelfs stuck up above the bed. I placed my Tin Lid ( Helmet ) on top of the shelf, trouble was every time someone moved, these shelfs wobbled, until eventually the Tin Lid came down upon my Chanter smashing it to smithereens. A couple of days later, feeling rather depressed, and down in the dumps, I rushed out of the Room and also slammed down the Lid of my Pipe Case, bang went another Chanter, sheer carelessness. It wasnt even the end of the week when another one went, we were having a Pipe Band Practice, and as you do, we were all in different corners blowing and Tuning, when, without thinking I placed my left hand on the stock and my right hand at the chanter bottom and twisted between the two. The Chanter didnt budge or turn it snapped in Two. I was ready for doing a runner, no one could have as much bad luck as this. It was around this time I began to believe in the saying, everything happens in three's.
Arthur and I were young Boy Pipers together at the Guards Piping School in Pirbright Surrey. We Joined the 1st Battalion Scots Guards in February 1956 at Wellington Barracks London.
Wee Story behind this one: Besides Arthur and I at the Piping School there was another Boy Piper called Brian Mitchell. Brian was from Ramsgate or thereabouts.
He had always wanted to be a Piper in the Scots Guards, but, being English found it difficult to enlist as such. Uptill that point in time there were no English Born Pipers in the Scots Guards, nothing to do with racism or any such thing, the fact was Piping wasnt as wide spread as it is today. Anyway! I digress, help came for Brian from a very unusual source.
During that time there was a very popular Radio Show called ( not 100% sure ) Down Your Way fronted by Wilfred Pickles, his catchfrase was ' Give em the Money Mabel ' Mabel being his wife. Wilfred took up Brians case, Newspaper Headlines etc etc and Lo and Behold Brian became a Boy Piper in the Scots Guards.
